Hold on to whatever you find, baby
Hold on to whatever will get you through
Hold on to whatever you find, baby
I don't trust myself with loving you
- "I Don't Trust Myself (With Loving You)", Continuum
Studio version:
Live version with crazy intro and solo:
As if I didn't brag about my girl enough in my earlier post, but more than anything the reason why I love her so much is she had the courage to risk her heart with me. This song has struck a chord with me (as has a lot of other JM songs) because since my parents' marriage was so rocky, I never really got to witness on a day-to-day basis how to love a woman. I heard a lot of second-hand stuff from other good men, but still.
And from the get-go there's always been this doubt, not just from a physical standpoint (although apparently I'm not doing that badly, LOL), but emotionally if I would be able to respect and care for my girl the way she deserves. But like I said, she makes it easy. I've dealt with so much BS from people in my life that anytime someone comes along who is unabashedly honest and open, it's refreshing. It's like eating a real mango after eating nothing but mango candy your whole life.
It's been good so far, but when times get rough, as they inevitably will (from my cynical perspective), will I be strong enough to walk with her through them? And even though I'm crazy about her, I still enjoy flirting, and I wonder if, when faced with an incredible amount of temptation, especially when another girl wants to turn things up a notch, will I be strong enough to resist?
But part of me feels like I will be, and that's because if there's anything I DON'T want to do, it's break her heart. She's been through enough crap in her life, and the last thing I want is to add even more. I also want our relationship to be as drama-free as possible, since my parents' was so bad.
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